Most jobs require education, training, mentoring & certification, AND YET a majority of people enter into partnerships auto-piloting, and hoping that (1) things work out, and that (2) the adult of our childhoods modeled it properly for us. To be good at marriage/partnerships, we need education, and training/mentoring just like any professional job. At a minimum, I recommend reading all books by John Gottman & Stan Tatkin, which are information based on research and science. We need an equivalent masters level degree knowledge in relationships to do this job well.

couples class

Resources for Couples

Videos                TEDx with Stan Tatkin:
                            Relationships are Hard  But Why

               TEDx with Joanne Davila:
                             Skills for Healthy
​                             Romantic Relationships

RELATIONSHIPS
Book: 7 Principles for Making Marriage Work - by John Gottman & Nan Silver
                      Article: Masters of Love - The Science on Lasting Relationships                      
                      Article: How to Keep Love Strong - Summary of the 7 Principles 
                    PDF poster: How to Keep Love Strong
                    Video: 7 Principles
                    Love Maps
                    Love Maps + more worksheets (from book 7 Principles)
                    Article: The 4 Horsemen - Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness & Stonewalling
Books: Mindful Relationship Habits - by Barrie Davenport
             201 Relationship Questions 
             Journal for 201 Questions (pdf, 300 pages)
Book: Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence - by Esther Perel
                     Esther Perel's Blog
                     Esther Perel's TED Talks
Book: Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment - by Amir Levine
                     Gottman Institute: Interview with Amir Levine 
Book: Wired for Love (on the topic of diffusing conflict) - by Stan Tatkin
                     Gottman Institute: Podcast Interview with Stan Tatkin 
Book: Hold Me Tight - by Sue Johnson  (PDF of Hold Me Tight)
Book: Modern Kinship: A Queer Guide to Christian Marriage - by David & Constantino Khalaf

What Is Your Attachment Style?

​WEBSITES

• The Gottman Institute (John & Julie Gottman)
  • ​Gottman-trained therapists
• The PACT Institute (Stan Tatkin)
  • ​ Therapists trained by PACT
• Dr. Sue Johnson
  • ​Therapists trained in EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy)
• Esther Perel
• Straight Spouse Network (support for couples with a straight spouse and an LGBTQ spouse)

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COMMUNICATION
Book: Living Nonviolent Communication: Practical Tools - by Marshall Rosenberg
​Essay from book (readable online) - By Marshall Rosenberg
                     Slides: Nonviolent Communication Flow (for full screen, click "Present" under View tab)
​                     NVC website: NVC Model from Center for Nonviolent Communication

What is NVC?

​Book: Taking the War Out of Our Words - by Sharon Ellison
                    Articles from PNDC - Powerful Non-Defensive Communication ​​​

Sharon Ellison Videos on the "War Model of Communication"​

     Why Are We So Defensive?

     Why Can't We Think Straight When We Get Defensive?

     Are We Addicted To Power Struggle?

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Tools for Parents & Children

• Comprehensive Resource Links (google docs)
• Family Meetings (3 examples)
  • by Positive Discipline
  • by Colorado State University
  • by Center for Parenting Education 
• The TOOLBOX by Dovetail Learning (a non-profit that seeks to empower kids how to be empathetic, resilient, be emotionally self-aware, and communicate non-violently)

            Introduction to the Toolbox

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Step Families / Blended Families
Books: 

• The Stepfamily Handbook: From Dating, to Getting Serious, to forming a "Blended Family"
• Surviving and Thriving in Stepfamily Relationships: What Works and What Doesn't
• Wisdom On Step-Parenting: How to Succeed Where Others Fail
• Building Love Together in Blended Families: The 5 Love Languages and Becoming Stepfamily Smart
• The Smart Stepfamily: Seven Steps to a Healthy Family

Google Slides on Step Families from Prepare Enrich

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couples class main page

core curriculum