INTRODUCTION
When we go through life's heat (pressures, struggles, crisis), how do we respond? Do we yield and soften? Do we resist and harden? Or do we catalyze positive change in our relationships and environment? Perhaps there is not one particular way in which we respond, but it is still worth noticing which pattern we default into the most, and with this self-knowledge hopefully learn to find a balance in the different ways of responding to life's challenges.
When we go through life's heat (pressures, struggles, crisis), how do we respond? Do we yield and soften? Do we resist and harden? Or do we catalyze positive change in our relationships and environment? Perhaps there is not one particular way in which we respond, but it is still worth noticing which pattern we default into the most, and with this self-knowledge hopefully learn to find a balance in the different ways of responding to life's challenges.
The Carrot, The Egg & The Coffee Bean
(Author Unknown)
A young girl went to her grandmother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling.
It seemed that, as one problem was solved, a new one arose. Her grandmother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil.
In the first, she placed an egg, in the second she placed an carrot, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans.
She let them sit and boil, without saying a word. In about twenty minutes, she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup.
(Author Unknown)
A young girl went to her grandmother and told her about her life and how things were so hard for her. She did not know how she was going to make it and wanted to give up. She was tired of fighting and struggling.
It seemed that, as one problem was solved, a new one arose. Her grandmother took her to the kitchen. She filled three pots with water and placed each on a high fire. Soon the pots came to a boil.
In the first, she placed an egg, in the second she placed an carrot, and in the last she placed ground coffee beans.
She let them sit and boil, without saying a word. In about twenty minutes, she turned off the burners. She fished the carrots out and placed them in a bowl. She pulled the eggs out and placed them in a bowl. Then she ladled the coffee out and placed it in a cup.
Turning to her granddaughter, she asked, "Tell me, what do you see?"
"An egg, a carrot, and coffee," the young girl replied.
She asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Then the grandmother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The granddaughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.
The granddaughter then asked, "Grandma, what does it mean?"
"An egg, a carrot, and coffee," the young girl replied.
She asked her to take an egg and break it. After pulling off the shell, she observed the hard-boiled egg. Then the grandmother brought her closer and asked her to feel the carrots. She did and noted that they were soft. Finally, she asked her to sip the coffee. The granddaughter smiled as she tasted its rich aroma.
The granddaughter then asked, "Grandma, what does it mean?"
Her grandmother explained: “Well, these objects had faced the same adversity - namely, the boiling water - but each of the three reacted very differently. The egg had been fragile. Its thin outer shell had protected its liquid interior. But, after sitting through the boiling water, its inside became hardened! The carrot went in strong, hard and unrelenting. However, after being subjected to the boiling water, it became soft.
The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.”
"So, tell me, which among these three are you?" the grandmother asked her granddaughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you an egg, a carrot, or a coffee bean?"
The ground coffee beans were unique, however. After they were in the boiling water, they had changed the water.”
"So, tell me, which among these three are you?" the grandmother asked her granddaughter. "When adversity knocks on your door, how do you respond? Are you an egg, a carrot, or a coffee bean?"
REFLECTION QUESTIONS
- Which part of the story did you find the most important? Which part of the story resonated with you?
- What experiences have you had that is close to this story?
- Where do you find yourself in this story? Which part of the story is about you?
- What challenges in life hardened you?
- In what ways were you softened? What new wisdom changed you?
- In what ways are you like the ground coffee beans? How might you have changed the waters you are in?
Guide for Facilitators of Spiritual Care Support Groups
Leader's Guide
Participant's Guide
Reflection Sheet 1
Reflection Sheet 2
Examples
Background1
Background2
Participant's Guide
Reflection Sheet 1
Reflection Sheet 2
Examples
Background1
Background2