INTRODUCTION
This story and four others (namely, Samurai and the Monk, The Dragon and the Healer, Facing Fear, Tigers and a Strawberry) are stories about the human brain: the subcortex and the neocortex. Stan Tatkin's book "Wired for Love" calls them the Primitives and the Ambassadors respectively. All these stories illustrate how we experience them in our body. Per usual, spiritual teachers invite us to practice self-awareness and mindfulness so that we have a choice, instead of merely defaulting and autopiloting to old conditioned patterns and behaviors. A little bit of freedom goes a long way.
This story and four others (namely, Samurai and the Monk, The Dragon and the Healer, Facing Fear, Tigers and a Strawberry) are stories about the human brain: the subcortex and the neocortex. Stan Tatkin's book "Wired for Love" calls them the Primitives and the Ambassadors respectively. All these stories illustrate how we experience them in our body. Per usual, spiritual teachers invite us to practice self-awareness and mindfulness so that we have a choice, instead of merely defaulting and autopiloting to old conditioned patterns and behaviors. A little bit of freedom goes a long way.
The Two Wolves (a Cherokee wisdom story)
An elder talking to a child says, “I have two wolves fighting and at war in my heart. One wolf is fearful, arrogant, greedy, vengeful, envious, resentful and deceitful. The other wolf is compassionate, loving, humble, kind, empathetic, generous, truthful and peaceful.”
The child asks, “Which wolf will win the fight?”
The elder responds, “The one I feed. That doesn’t mean that we try to deny or hurt or kill the angry wolf. If we did that we’d end up in a long battle, all the while somehow making that wolf more powerful through our hostility and fear. Hating that wolf sucks the strength right out of us. Instead, we calmly pay attention to the angry wolf and let go of believing they have the answers. If we can do that, they end up lying down next to us - no longer an enemy."
He continues: "We help strengthen the kind loving wolf by giving it nourishment and support so that we can follow it. That peaceful wolf can become our steady companion, and show us the way through all kinds of different life experiences: restful or chaotic, enjoyable or disappointing experiences may come and go. But we can have a guide with us through it all. This is what our awareness of these two wolves within us can help us do. We can choose which wolf to feed. We can choose what we will gently let go off and leave behind. We don’t have to be at the mercy of old habits, or old ways of thinking, or old ways of being that make us walk backward. We are empowered. It just takes practice."
An elder talking to a child says, “I have two wolves fighting and at war in my heart. One wolf is fearful, arrogant, greedy, vengeful, envious, resentful and deceitful. The other wolf is compassionate, loving, humble, kind, empathetic, generous, truthful and peaceful.”
The child asks, “Which wolf will win the fight?”
The elder responds, “The one I feed. That doesn’t mean that we try to deny or hurt or kill the angry wolf. If we did that we’d end up in a long battle, all the while somehow making that wolf more powerful through our hostility and fear. Hating that wolf sucks the strength right out of us. Instead, we calmly pay attention to the angry wolf and let go of believing they have the answers. If we can do that, they end up lying down next to us - no longer an enemy."
He continues: "We help strengthen the kind loving wolf by giving it nourishment and support so that we can follow it. That peaceful wolf can become our steady companion, and show us the way through all kinds of different life experiences: restful or chaotic, enjoyable or disappointing experiences may come and go. But we can have a guide with us through it all. This is what our awareness of these two wolves within us can help us do. We can choose which wolf to feed. We can choose what we will gently let go off and leave behind. We don’t have to be at the mercy of old habits, or old ways of thinking, or old ways of being that make us walk backward. We are empowered. It just takes practice."
REFLECTION QUESTIONS
- What did you find to be the most important part of the story? What resonated with you?
- What experiences have you had that is close to this story?
- Where do you find yourself in this story? Which part of the story is about you?
- What moments in your journey felt like you fed the angry wolf? What moments in your experience felt like you fed the kind wolf?
Guide for Facilitators of Spiritual Care Support Groups
